Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Ding Ding! End of round 1...but the FIGHT isn't over!!!

As you can tell from my corny title I had my first round of Chemotherapy today. Even though I went alone and was nervous as hell. I showed no fear. Want a recap of my shitty crappy day? .....well?....Didn't think so, but I'm going to make you suffer through it anyway...ha ha, lol, lmao and all that crap.

Tuesday July 5, 2011
6:00am to 8:00am ...Finally got a little sleep. I haven't been able to sleep since last week.(probably stress)
8:30am to 9:30am ...Drive to Baptist (hey I'm not gonna speed and risk dying in a car before I beat this)
9:45am to 10:30am..Check In, Give blood( Gotta make sure those cell counts are at the top of their game)
10:30am to 11:00am.Talk with Oncologist about the risks....(the big one being congestive heart failure)
11:30am to 2:00pm...Had 5 different drugs pumped through a hole in my chest. 2 was for nausea. 2 were the chemo drugs. No idea what the other one was for I completely forgot. Maybe something for allergic reactions.
2:00pm to 2:30pm scheduled my next appointment(FREAKING TOMORROW!!!) Also the appointment for the next round of chemo.
2:30pm to 4:00pm Talked to Cancer Services about possible wigs and hats. (More humiliation...Cancer IS SUCH A BITCH)
4:00pm to 5:00pm...Ride back home alone...I felt ok this morning so I drove myself. Before you start freaking about me being alone. I was fine and I did ok driving.

Ok see you made it through the hard part. I felt ok driving home. I didn't have any reactions until I was home for about an hour. I was finding it hard to breathe. Felt like someone had caved in my chest. So I was very short of breath. The nurses had already told me to expect this. But it was still kinda scary. It came and went for hours. I became real hot and sweaty...but was pale at the same time. I was lucky enough to actually fight off the nausea. Even though I wasn't able to fight off the bone pain or migraine headaches. It is almost 5:00am and I'm still awake. I'm very tired, but my head hurts so bad. I cried alot earlier because I hurt so bad and nothing really helped. I cried quite a bit today. Since chemo finally started , I'm becoming afraid of what my body is going to have to endure. I'm afraid I won't be so lucky with the side effects after a few days. I already feel less of a woman because of all the surgeries. Now I have to figure out how to hide the tears with jokes and laughter. I'm not sure this is going to happen. But then again I have been pretty damn strong so far. I pray that this continues on the same successful path. That God gives me the strength to survive.

Ok I really have to try and sleep for awhile. NIGHT NIGHT

Friday, July 1, 2011

Just in time for the 4th of July!!!

Today I will not be talking about Cancer or complaining about my family. I want to share with you something that brought tears to my eyes and a smile on my face.

(A homecoming months in the making)

This is my cousin Tiffany...(well technically my cousin's daughter). I have not seen her in years. Been a very long time since we played together at Granny's. I have been reunited with alot of my cousins on facebook, thankfully. Anyway back to Tiffany..She is a military wife. A loving mother of 3 gorgeous children. One of the bravest women I have known. She spends day after day...month after month raising her children alone. Because her husband chose not only to protect his family, but to protect every family in this country. For that I am very grateful. I hate that Tiffany and her children have to spend so much time away from the soldier that has put his life on the line for all of us. I think about alot of things since I have gotten sick. I wonder how scared she must be at times. How many times she has cried. How much she has had to endure on her own. ALL THIS FOR OUR FREEDOM!!! I'm sure alot of people forget about the part of the family that is left at home. To hope and pray that their loved ones make it home. So when I saw the picture posted above. I pictured Tiffany running into the arms of the bravest man she knows. I would have posted other pictures but she hasn't been able to post any yet. Plus I never ask permission to use this one. It just touched me so much I was sure she would understand. .....So in closing...Tiffy I love you...and tell your husband whom I have never met...THANK YOU!!!!